Monday, November 17, 2008

Day 3 After The Storm

Crooning on my STEREO: All Cried Out by ALLURE

Mum is here with me today, so it is alright. When you have someone minding you after work hours and nagging at the flat, i guess it distracts me quite a bit. I hate to say that when I was out shopping with her just now, I passed by the perfume shop and I had a glance at Moschino Friends. That familiar scent.

Now, it rings a bell as to why he finished that bottle I bought him in March. That was hardly 7 months ago. And I knew he could keep a small bottle for years.

He was using it with her. Even the shower gel. The aftershave.

See? I can't get over it. All these little details are sinking in. It drives me nuts. He's got a nice new jacket. He shopped it with her. He has got a new pair of trendy eye glasses. He shopped it with her. And he lost weight.

And he looked so good just two weeks ago.

It is probably because of her.

I can't stop whining. And so i thought it may be best if someone got me a photo of her so that I am convinced that she is ugly. I swear I will shut up.

Betrayal is a bitch. Schlampe. And it is winter. So I have decided to enrol for ski lessons in January. I have got my skis, boots except the sticks. I am going to dig winter sports. My loyal figure ice skates are on the way from KL to Munich via Fedex. My lovely friends are encouraging me to go out again. I am hoping to get a car by next winter, and my calculations tells me that getting a Porsche in Bavaria is a better long term bet than a BMW.

Even work is empathizing with me. My promotion occurred at the same time as the crisis. Consequently they revealed my 2009 business travel agenda which consist of almost everywhere except Italy. Thank god for that.

Some say that at 25, I have the whole world in front of me.

But I am struggling to smile. It is hard.

What is happiness when you have lost the one you love for eternity? A porsche can never replace that.


car@ said...

Happiness is to see you in Málaga in DEC!! happiness is to go out with friend to dinner and drink a few beers and be a little bit high is the sky. Hapiness is to meet new people, new cultures, travel, is hard Lyn, you won't get ovet it in 1 week. Probably neither in two months. Everyone has its rythem. You mark your rythem. It's compleatetly normal you imagine him with her, we all have done that. SHE IS NOT more beautiful than you. And she might not even know this whole situation. Infact, she prolly didn't know Gio had a girlfriend from KL. Who knows....don't blame her. The only one to blame is HIM. The only one to forget about is HIM! i just hope he is not doing the same to that girl...i know latinos...i sure know!

Hugs hon!!! good nite and i hope you sleep tight ( even for a cuple of hours) .

Jolenesiah said...

Yup i strongly agreed with Car@, is not ur fault, and the one to blame is Gio.

shopping is a good therapy to temporary make u forget bout things...


sicko said...

Yes,a porsche can! :) hang in there lyn.

socialpest aka ameera said...

I just love Cara, she's said it all for me. :)

You didn't lose the love of your life babe, he has yet to arrive. :) Yes, go travel! Go ski-ing! Go crazy! You ARE young and the whole world IS in front of you. You'll be fabulous again in no time.

car@ said...

Socialpest!! i love you too! :-)
You put it inot much nicer words than me, know i tend to be a bit of dislexic hahahahaha! :-*
Lyn, you look GREAT in the pics! and your friends LOVE YOU!!!! :-D that is one of the greatest gifts of all :-)

Yng Lyn said...

Carol, happiness is just a week away :) And I will see you soon and I need a BIG HUG!!!!! love ya :)

Jolene :) shopping is good.. but at the rate I am going I will run into debts. How can I ever replace him? hugs to you dear

sicko: yes as we spoke I have a problem with left seat drive, and to drive the boxster down from Stuttgart is 3 hours!!!

then again I get to experience the autobahn to bring my baby home :) Autumn 2009!!!!

socialpest, thanks dear.. but somehow I am still not smiling. I really don't know why... i should be happy but I am not :( hugs..