Wednesday, August 24, 2005
CONFESSION BOX- PART ONE
Dear Padre Amaro,
I hath come to confess my sins committed within the last 5 days. I hath blown my weekly allowance by 500quid on materialistic pleasures.
Bad, I know.
But I contend that such is necessary. As our Heavenly Father would have probably noticed, I was plagued by earthly evils such as MAN PROBLEMS that consequently leads to WORK PROCRASTINATION and LOW SELF ESTEEM.
So......in divine grace and courage I needed to get myself out of this rut. Therefore I needed a GOOD BREAK. Instead of moaning like a discontented harlot, I resorted to the simple mortal approach of
Thank God for this miraculous decision. I spent three wonderful days with one my dearest friends and bought a bagload full of beautifying junk.
Not only hath I come back impoverished like a church mouse,
LIFE LOOKS WONDERFUL ONCE AGAIN
I had my final dose of mayonnaise drenched kebab, I waved goodbye to Dunkirk where I dwelled for 2 years and sworn at sinful night haunts such as THE WORKS and FACES for shutting its doors on a MONDAY NIGHT. I even took an eternal memorabilia of the Beeston Chavs whom I so, so, so adored and am going to miss. (above)
Okay. I am beginning to sound shallow. Then again, God made me a total woman. I like clothes. I like shoes. I like legwarmers.
But I like God too.
I really do.
Therefore I am here to seek divine forgiveness simply because no other mortal being was hurt in this prompt self indulgence process.
Praise good ol' God for imparting the origins of retail therapy. It hath saved many a troubled soul.
Oh, another request for forgiveness: I will be sorting my tattoo this weekend.......
Thank You Father. Please grant me a abundant week ahead... *cough cough*