Friday, September 09, 2005

FATkin's DIET


Absolute Monster in my Kitchen.
Originally uploaded by slamducky.
Crooning on my STEREO: You're Beautiful by JAMES BLUNT

Today I bring you a new REVOLUTIONARY self-prescribed diet:

LYN'S FATKINS DIET

For the aspiring celebrity who dreams endlessly of expanding her waistline, increasing her dress size and oozing her sex appeal, the FATKINS DIET is just what you need.

To achieve that gorgeous body you've always dreamed of, just follow this revolutionary diet plan for 3 days:

MORNING:
1) 150grams of Walkers Thai Sweet Chilli Potato Crisps
2) Hot chocolate with full cream milk.
3) 3 scrambled eggs
4) 1 tablespoon of mayonaise straight from the jar.

AFTERNOON:
1) 1 foot long toasted Subway Meatball Marinara Sandwich- ask for extra MEAT.
2) 2 cans of DIET COKE
3) 2 packets of 50g Walkers Sour Cream Chips

MID AFTERNOON:
1) Your choice of 1 McDonald's Sandwich- the more OIL the merrier.
2) 1 Large McDs Fries drenched in BBQ sauce

EVENING:
1) 4 Krispy Kreme Original Glazed Donuts
2) 1 Can of Lemonade Soda
3) 2 portions of Laughing Cow Cheese

LATE EVENING:
1) 1 Large portion of cheap Lamb Doner Kebab drowned in Mayonaise
2) 1 Tomato Juice
3) 1 gigantic slice of pita bread

BEFORE BEDTIME:
1) 1 Imodium Indigestion Tablet.



RESULTS GUARANTEED IN THREE DAYS.

Disclaimer: ynglyn.blogspot.com will not be held responsible over any loss of lives, regurgitation, constipation or psychological trauma caused while attempting this diet.

35 comments:

Simple American said...

You know the laughing cow cheese is on the South Beach diet too. Just three days Ah Mui?

Anonymous said...

Oi, whatchoo doin'? Get outta my cook book!
dann

Kunstemæcker said...

Sounds like a gorgeous diet to me. Let's try it when you're here in Belgium!

Caracola said...

LOL Lyn!!!! jajajaaja! i am laughing out loud while i am typimg...and yes: imodium works great! jajajaja! ;-)

crazycat said...

omg!! i have to stay away from you!! u temptress!

Jess said...

Actually, reading that has successfully scared away any trace of appetite I may have had. Thanks Lyn! I owe it to you for my new svelte self!

LE said...

extra meat....mmmmmmm.

those potato crips sound goooood.

ty bluesmith said...

sign me up

oceanskies79 said...

Oh, what a diet. I don't think I would want to try. I would prefer to eat lots of vegetables for my meals.

Anyway, have a good weekend.

Yng Lyn said...

kor kor: Serious? I should try the south beach diet.. muahaaha.
Yes. Fatkins is effective in three days!

Dann: you have a cook book???

kracker: I will have to add in 60 pints of beer onto the diet list when I am in Belgium....

caracolacolacola: hahahah I loveee imodium.. it saves me a lot of embarassment :) hahaah hugs!!!!

crazycat: I am the devil... I am the snake.. muahaah

jess: wow!!! I never knew I was THAT good!!! But i still miss the Krispy Kremes though...

le: potato crisps is always a winner ;)

tblue: no registration required... you can begin your diet plan any time of the day!

oceanskies: ahhh you're healthy!! have a good week too babe! :D

Carrie said...

OH I LOVE YOU!!!!
a girl after my own STOMACH! HA!

sounds DELICIOUS and just what the fat doctor ordered!

i'm so doing this diet...ahem.
;)

delfina said...

lovely diet(= people should love food, really!

mistipurple said...

OMG, this is my regular diet!! congratulate me, i m doing something right for once in my life!

mistipurple said...

lemme find a couch.. hugs therapy time!! grin.

eyeris said...

hey, haven't been seeing you online leh... Am gonna be in London this Wednesday/Thursday!

Any news on any place I can crash for a day or two?? :)

Supermans Foot said...

I really think someone somewhere will try this. Please reveal yourself!

Simple American said...

Its been seven hours Ah Mui. Status report. Come on.

No stress. ;)

Simple American said...

Are you finished yet?!?!?!?!?

Caracola said...

UPDATE LEH!!!! I wanna read one of your entries gar! miss you!!!
and oh! *did i ever told you you should get a chatboxx??* jajajajaja!
Hugggssss!

Simple American said...

Yeah. What CC saud!!!!!

Kunstemæcker said...

UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE!!!!

Simple American said...

And what he said!!!!

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