Sunday, June 26, 2005

My Big Fat Greek Adventure Part 2

Crooning on my STEREO: Time After Time by CYNDI LAUPER

Despite missing out on a potential Greek fling, I met the MAN OF MY FANTASIES immortalised in the form of STONE....


Ladies and Gentlemen, let me introduce you to

The 17 year old ANTINOUS

As you can tell from his girly name, ANTINOUS is GAY. He shares a BED with EMPEROR HADRIAN who is god-knows- 20-years his senior. Yeah, they SLEEP TOGETHER. A SAGGY OLD MAN in LOVE with a VIRGINAL YOUNG MAN.

HOO-HAH

Anyway, I don't give a damn if they're more gay than Elton John.
The point is:
ANTINOUS IS FUCKING HOT.
I must salute Emperor Hadrian (despite his paedophillic motive) for his BLOODY GOOD TASTE. Even Michael Jackson doesn't kidnap halfway decent looking boys into Neverland.

Check out his bum.

Agree?

Bloody well built for an adolescent boy. Apparently he flexes his muscles consistently at the ancient Roman gynasium* (obviously now in ruins.... but how I YEARN to go back in time ). According to some rather poetic sources, his wavy and gladiator-esque hair is NATURAL.
No WAXING, NO BUFFING, NO SILLICON IMPLANTS, NO CLOTHES, NO Y-FRONTS.... NOTHING.**
NADA.


HE JUST LOOKS B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L

Truth is, this boy must have been quite a HOTTIE HUNK in order to have his pretty face modelled into 100s of 'sex toys' (aka. Roman sculptures) adorning Emperor Hadrian's vast empire. Courtesy of his generous sugar daddy, he even has a CITY named after him.

How cool is that?

It only gets better: ANTINOUS IS A RELIGION***(You can still worship him TODAY. E-mail me for the cult address) Just when I thought that I was the QUEEN of 'BOY PIN-UP' obssession, that old man Hadrian beats me hands down.


That's it.
I've lost salvation in mortal men.****


------------------------------------------------

* Thought you might want to know that ancient athletes used to work their muscles without any clothes on, like, totally NAKED.

** Ma Mere's LOUIS GARREL was my favourite male nude until I 'met' ANTINOUS last week.

*** Before you cringe, a rather obssessive and deluded Emperor Hadrian believed that anyone who drowned in the Nile (which was eventually Antinous' fate) would be proclaimed a GOD. It is still a mystery as to how this sexy little boy ended up in the river...
(A new version revealed that a certain Señorita Lyn had a tussle with Emperor Hadrian over Antinous at the scene of the accident......but just as Antinous realised that he himself MAY as well be heterosexual.......)

**** Since NO mortal man is interested in me anyway.

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm a mortal man aren't I?

Anonymous said...

hola amorcito;
you know what, i was just reading about Hadrian over the weekend and the book didn't mention anything about his fancy for handsome young boys,

make that 2 mortal men,

our Helen(lyn) of Troy, the face that launch a thousands ships.

chau

Yng Lyn said...

caracola: yeah lahhh... I will continue the next part with more hilarious stories!!! :) hugs!!!!

Steph: dont cheat on yer boyfriend!!!!!!! muahahaahaha

kunstemaecker: pero eres immortal!!!

cariño: Lyn of Troy whose hideous face launched a thousand shipwrecks......

Anonymous said...

Thanx for the compliment. I guess everyone who writes is immortal. So there are plenty of men out there for you! Ahem .. ahem.

Anonymous said...

U ... rock-o-phile!!

dann

Yng Lyn said...

Kunstemaecker: ah hah! good point!! I shall feel hopeful at last........
muchas gracias!

Dann: I AM COMING BACK THIS SATURdAYy!!!!! CALL ME!!!
Rock-o-phile indeed I am...

Anonymous said...

What? U call me!
You told me you have a new number!

dann

Yng Lyn said...

Jess: Ah hah!!! glad you liked it!!! I realised that ancient sculptures are more pleasing to the eye than boyband posters! lol

Danny: i lost yer number on my sim card.. anyway my nos 012 3242727
I changed it back to the old one!

Anonymous said...

Is it smart to post your number on the internet?

Yng Lyn said...

kunstemaecker: hahah its alright, I am a bit of a celebrity anyway ;)
anyway stalkers dont know the country code!

Anonymous said...

Mm. I'm a stalker. =D
No honestly, got your number, remove it b4 someone learns the area code.
I'll call u as soon as ... Sunday?
dann

Debs said...

hahahwah ... rockophaelia ... groovy lyn ;)

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