My Big Fat Greek Adventure Part 1

Mycenae, Greece
Originally uploaded by slamducky.

Crooning on my STEREO: Angel de La Noche by DAVID BISBAL

For those who wondered if I've been mauled by lions last week, I was actually dwelling in (what was once) the cradle of civilisation- GREECE.

I was based in Athens and travelled out to the usual areas of Delphi, Mycenae and northern Peloponese. (Bet my spelling is wrong) Stayed with a bunch of rock stars in a 4-star hotel located in a red light district area of Athens.

For the past 6 days I was climbing hills, trotting on ruins and hallucinating over what the Greek Gods ACTUALLY looked like. I came to a conclusion that POSEIDON was a merman and APOLLO was gay. (I will write a separate post on this.)

In comparison to the summer-less British weather, Greece was a barbeque pit. I acquired a hideous tan and my nose was burnt.

Flew on the Hungarian Airlines- MALEV- and had to transit for two hours in Budapest that is arguably the MOST BORING airport in Europe. Shops were scant, food was scarce and people were... scary. My advice? Avoid this godforsaken place if you can.

Despite the MALEV'S reasonable airfares, I must warn you that the flights' LANDINGS are no better than a crash landing practice. I had to sit through FOUR of those turbulent landings... three of which I was close to GAGGING OUT MY DIGESTIVES.

As you can sense I am pretty exhausted.

Nevertheless it was an excellent trip because I've learnt some important things:

1) It is VERY possible to fall in love with a stone sculpture
2) You can pass off as a Greek by putting a pair of shades on.
3) Never wear flip flops when climbing up to the Parthenon.
4) It is sexy to be hairy.
5) Heavy Metal still dominates certain parts of the world.
6) British Immigration Officers are bastards.

And other miscellaneous stuff which I will blog about later. I am still jetlagged and knackered.

Off to bed now but who would have guessed that I saw GAEL GARCIA BERNAL in flesh and blood barely three hours ago.......