Tuesday, May 17, 2005

PISSED

Crooning on my STEREO: Lucky by BRITNEY SPEARS

Yeah you've guessed it, I am FUCKING PISSED OFF TODAY.

3 hours ago, my acting teacher threatened to KICK me OUT of drama school.

He said that I've learnt nothing but SHIT in the last god-knows-how-many-months.

Apparently I am LIFELESS.

Apparently I have SWITCHED OFF.


Maybe he was RIGHT.

I can't fucking help it if I have spent the last 3 fucking weeks writing out 12,000 worth of shit to complete 75% of my fucking expensive degree in this fucking expensive country.

I cant fucking help it if I've spent the entire month indulging in self annihilation and SELF PITY.
It doesn't fucking help when I've drowned my pillow the night before and WAKE UP to endure ACCUSATIONS straight to MY FACE the very next MORNING.

CAN'T HELP IT IF I HAVE TO WORK MY ASS OFF AT SERVING CHAMPAGNE TO FAT VIP PIGS EVERY FUCKING WEEK

SLOG MY ASS OFF DAY AND NIGHT JUST TO MAKE SURE I JUSTIFY MY so-called 'USELESS' DEGREE.

PRETENDING THAT EVERYTHING IS ALRIGHT EVENTHOUGH EVERYTHING IS SUCH A DOWNRIGHT HIDEOUS MESS

LAST BUT NOT LEAST,
ENDURING OTHER PEOPLE'S SHIT.

Good thing I discovered font size HTML.

15 comments:

Jean said...

Hey Lynn! You're in drama school? That's so cool!!! :) What do you do in there?

Anyway, just dropped by to visit your blog.. hehe.. good going! :) glad to see you're ok in london, hehe..

Oh, and I do hope you feel better and less pissed off... at least you have a good outlet for your fury right? ;)

Suef said...

oh dear lyn, take it easy. your big fonts scare me :) you'll be fine.. take caree.. xx

sunny sunflower said...

eh darlin.. dun let snotty lecturers/drama school teachers let you get all down and out and fucking pissed..heh etime you snort in his face and show him every bit of acting you have...lol.be sweet and savvy and hate him like shit at the smae time... hehe gotta prove yourslef sometimes.

vincent said...

chill laa...

vincent said...

chill laa...

Kunstemæcker said...

RESPECT. I felt your anger. I actually felt as soon as I read the words 'Britney Spears'.

Seriously now, it's good to vent these emotions.

Anonymous said...

1. Bring out old Speed Metal CDs
2. Blast 'em.
3. Ignore the police at your door.
4. Go kickin' and screamin' to the station.
5. Spit in the questioning officer's face.
6. Kiss the next one.
7. Repeat cycle.

--danny

Miss Fern said...

Nice to see you're getting used to life ~ that's the way the cog fits.

0.o

Miss Fern said...

On a totally unrelated note:

I realised why I've been having trouble viewing your disturbing blogspace - I've been spelling your name Y-G-N instead of Y-N-G! ::or was it the other way round:: Well - all's I know is now I have unhindered access to your verbal diarrhea! Celebration!

^__^

Pip said...

And discover it you did.

I have my bachelor's degree in theatre and am currently trying to worm my way into master's programs through the cunning use of... applications.

Here's the problem with theatre instructors: 90% of them tried to be practitioners... and failed. They may make their failings sound like successes ("I directed blah, blah, blah"), but if they had really be successes, they'd still be practicing and not teaching.

They're bitter. They believe they deserve better. To be famous. To be lauded.

In reality, most of them simply aren't as talented as they thought they were, and they want to take it out on you.

(I exclude, of course, pure instructors who set out not to practice professionally, but to teach. I respect that.)

Yng Lyn said...

Jean: Thanks dear, for the comment... I am in drama school to sort out my failures with 'irinah'.. LOL

Sue Fern: thanks so much dear... good luck for yer exams, k? hugs

Debs: yeahh.. i will your advice of snorting into his face!! thanks for yer faith :)

Vincent: yeahh mannn.. will chill even more if Arsenal wins tommorrow.... ;)

Kunstesmaecker: Britney spears is the best example of teenage angst... LOL... but yeah.. its good to vent! Hope i didn't scare you off...

Danny: Speaking of which.. i should dig out my old Nirvana, Green Jelly and an early metallica albums. sepultura is good too.. muahahaah

Mei Fern: Life is sooo hard dear.... let's go furniture shopping!!! miss ya!

Pip: You're right... so, so right....
Acting is brutal in itself, the teachers are worse!!

Thanks for all your thoughts and you are all in my good books!

Abdul Qahar said...

Hi Yng Lyn,

From what Ive read in response to your "acting teacher", you actually have all the resourses you need to perform. Contrary to the fella's thoughts, you are alive and switched on (just to another channel perhaps =P). I believe you should find another teacher, someone who will encourage instead of discouraging you. I believe you will shine...just keep going. I know this because I performed with you and i know what you can do. So I think its just the tip of the iceberg for you, just dont explore it with that teacher anymore. Not worth your time in my opinion. Take care ya! =)

Yng Lyn said...

Hi Qahar,
Its really nice to hear from you! I will take to heart your advice because I respect and trust you as an actor. I am considering a change of classes, but it may be too late to do so considering how little time i have in this country...
I've never believed that acting should be cruel, it ought to bring out the best in humanity through harmless means. You're right that discouragement is not the right way to do it...
Thanks for everything, I'd like to work with you again one day! take care too k? keep in touch :)

Simple American said...

Wondering what you will do when all is said and done and you go back home?

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