Friday, October 22, 2004

What TYPE is YOUR MAN???

Take a sheet of paper.
Answer these objective questions with humour.
Check the results at the end.

DISCLAIMER: NO OFFENCE INTENDED FOR THE WEAK AT HEART

1) Your crush/boyfriend was born in

a) KUALA LUMPUR
b) BLACKPOOL
c) MELBOURNE
d) CHICAGO

2) His dress sense consists of
a) a pair of TED BAKER jeans (only one pair for the sake of posing), ill Fitting Designer Top and a pair of Air Jordans
b) The occasional adidas TRACKSUIT, a tarnished gold necklace (courrtesy of Claire's Accessories) and one stale BEANIE
c) A Hawaiian print shirt, cargo shorts to flash his hairy legs complete with a pair of flip flops.
d) Oversized t-shirt emblazed by a GOLD medallion and jeans three times his size.

3) His mobile phone is
a) God knows ( he changes to a new one every fortnight)
b) MOTOROLA S700
c) NOKIA 3210 (handed down by his sister 5 years ago)
d) A self assembled phone with a glittery cover to emulate the 'diamond' effect

4) His Favourite Shopping Destination is
a) Mid Valley, Malaysia
b) JD SPORTS
c) Harvey Norman in search of a new BBQ Pit.
d) Downtown HARLEM

5) His student accomodation is
a) the most expensive student house he can get his hands on (so as to impress other impoverished Malaysians)
b) A moss-infected student terrace block with overgrown creepers and a replica of Lothlorien in his backyard. Otherwise, he squats in a dodgy nightclub called KINGDOM
c) A wooden hut
d) A stolen modified Mercedes C-class (note: check MTV's Pimp My Ride)

6) As for sports, he likes to play
a) BASKETBALL (gone were the days when dating boys from the school basketball team was considered a crowning glory)
b) FOOTBALL (he played for his local football team 5 years ago, it was the peak of his career)
c) RUGBY, FOOTY, BASEBALL, CRICKET, HOCKEY. FENCING, LAWNBOWLING and any sport you can think of.
d) None. Perhaps some random slam dunks with the neighbourhood kids. Oh, guns.

7) Over-used spoken vocabulary
a) WAH LAU!!!!!!!!
b) SHIT, SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT
c) Blah blah blah.... MATE
d) Yo, Me Brovaz in Da Hood

8) He swoons over
a) Anorexic models like Channel [v]'s Cindy Burbridge
b) David Beckham.... and his nails.
c) Surfer Chicks and burnt BBQ meat.
d) Any living creature in a BIKINI

9) His name is somewhere along the lines of
a) LIM AH KAU (guised under an exotic English name of MARCO)
b) BRIAN MANCHESTER (hideously monotonous and common)
c) CROCODILE HUNTER (so engrossed with wildlife that he forgets his name)
d) 50 CENT

If your answers are MOSTLY
A
He is a Malaysian wannabe cool rich Western brat. Usually ugly and pimply.
B
He is a First Class British TOWNIE craving for absolute attention. Apparently does the full monty in male changing rooms. FOR HEAVENS SAKE.
C
He is a DOWN UNDER WOMBAT. As part of his romantic commitment, he takes you to the outward bound camp.
D
P.Diddy is his mentor. He is a BLING-BLING GIGOLO. Don't expect an engagement ring from Tiffany's, he will get you a gawdy gold one from Harvey Nichol's.

6 comments:

lets get the SHIT outta here said...

1)Being born and bred in BLACKPOOL doesn't make one a townie cos i've witnessed first-hand,how refined some guys from there really are&they turn out to be future leaders:)

2)Brian Manchester is a unique name.The surname 'Manchester'or
'Munster'(as the northerners might call it)isn't common at all, so could it be a sign that only aristocrats or Lords and Viscounts were the privilleged few who were entitled with this posh surname?

3)Shopping in JD Sports truly signifies that some people
are down-to-earth normal mortals who love shopping for the best bargains for sports attire!

4)Wearing a tarnished gold chain could mean that he treasures his family heirloom.Taking it off for the occasional polishing may pose a huge risk of losing the family prized possession.Hence the explanation of the tarnished chain.

5)Living in a humble student house means that he is compassionate&charitable cos he gave all the other students the better choice of houses.Besides,all the creepers on the walls of his house signifies that he is an environmentalist.No cutting down plants!All his housemates also live by this theory.

6)As for the stale beanie..i don't see how a clean spotless white beanie could otherwise be termed "stale"

7)KINGDOM is a highly recommended club,probably rated the best in England.Which is why,Kingdom is the place to be if you want to scout around for any celebrities especially good looking footballers!

8)The current in-phone is a Motorola V600 not S700.just take a look at it's cool gagdets and you'll know why it's one of the "best-selling phones"(random salesperson
from Phones 4U)

9)Stripey scarves look cool on almost any guy especially
those who can carry it off well:)

10)Bangers&Mash=DELICIOUS+YUMMY

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Yng Lyn said...

Oh oh oh... KINGDOM beats CHINAWHITE anytime
LOL

Anonymous said...

1) tarnished chain as heirloom????? ok ok ...
2) Lord Manchester..... sounds bourgeousie
3) JD SPORTS is soooo TRENDY, I love spending weekends there with screaming kids in tracksuits
4) BlackPool is as posh as KNIGHTSBRIDGE

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