Monday, June 07, 2004


REMEMBER: People DO NOT speak straight from their hearts.

Situation: YOU are mourning the death of your beloved hamster. You ring your good friend to whine on the atrocity. Your SYMPATHETIC friend says,'I know how it feels. I have been through worse... my bird, fish, frog all died at the same time.'
The sympathetic friend's intention: 'Just shut up. What do you know about PAIN? My life is more unfortunate than yours and therefore I have suffered more sorrow than what your wussy heart can endure.'

Situation: YOU just stepped out of your exam hall, looking blatantly pissed off. A CONCERNED coursemate approaches you and asks,'So, how was it??,' followed by a cheesy grin.
The concerned coursemate's intention: 'I know you did shit. And I did better than you. I want to hear that you screwed up the paper from YOUR own mouth.'

Situation: YOU never had a boyfriend/girlfriend. A HELPFUL friend gives you some handy advice,'I think you should lower your expectations....' (add 'lah' into the last bit for some Malaysian flavour.)
The helpful friend's intention: 'Go date any Tom, Dick and Harry off the street. You are not that special anyway.'

Situation: Your friend went to a formal ball and she wants to show you some photos taken that night. Before she hands you the photo album, followed by a MODEST comment,' Don't get a shock, yeah? I look very ugly that night.'
The modest friend's intention: 'I look absolutely dropdead gorgeous that night and I want to stun you by lowering your expectations before you see me in all my Oscar glory.'
(p.s: How the hell would you want to show or take any photos if you really thought you looked ugly that night??)

Situation: You are collecting your exam results from your tutor. Your results are awful, and your EMPATHETIC tutor makes a remark,'Despite blah have potential.'
The empathetic tutor's intention: 'You are not intelligent. I LIE (as well to 50 other students) just to give you a fake glimmer of hope to get you through your cursed degree. And don't forget to pay your tuition fees, too.'


vincent said...

the tutor one is very very true...

Reubster said...

Hahaha that's so funny:)

Anonymous said...

VERY VERY TRUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Nanook : Good one Lyn! Can relate to most of it, esp the photos! URGH!

Yng Lyn said...

thanks guys, these are real life situations..... sigh.. pretty unavoidable

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